Rajyashri Goody
Creative Responses: Recipes For Resistance
Recipes adapted from Vijeta Kumar’s ‘The Nose, My Grandmother, Our Beef’ [which can be viewed in Recipes For Resistance Publication]
Your Nose
Discover a rotting
fish-like smell in your house.
Try to figure out the source.
Buy all kinds of disinfectants,
fragrant oils,
incense sticks.
Enlist your overworked,
pregnant wife
to clean every corner of the house.
Begin to feel guilty
about the omelet you had eaten
months ago.
This might be revenge.
This might definitely
be the work of your ancestors,
punishing you
for one egg.
Remind yourself
that you had taken care
to remove your sacred thread
before eating it,
showered with cold water
for seven mornings after.
Do you have to live with this
god-awful smell forever now?
The smell is alive.
It senses your movements.
It knows when you are
most awake in your sleep
and attacks your nostrils
in a way that makes you want
to avoid food completely.
Begin to hallucinate
a nose that walks,
sometimes jogs,
in front of your house every evening.
Forget the smell.
Chase your nose
as it slips under the cot.
See the culprit.
A gleaming
butchered corpse
of your wife’s
cod liver capsule.
Your Grandmother
Store Marie biscuits
in your blouse.
Store other things in there too –
coins, cups, plates, oranges, chips,
and silverware.
When your grandchildren are hungry
put your hand in
and out comes all the food.
When your son brings home meat,
cover your nose with your palm,
run to your bed,
mutter prayers.
Remember the Brahmin priest
who had caught your hand
and poked it while chanting mantras.
It was then that you
learnt upper caste ways of living
to become respectable
and vegetarian
and survive
with dignity.
Don’t let your illusion
with vegetarianism
bother you much
when you steal
your son’s whiskey
and down it all
in one shot.
Your Beef
Bring your children up
in a house that tries
to erase caste.
Give them names
that do not reveal their untouchability.
Send them to english-medium schools
to study.
They might pass as upper-caste.
They might try.
While on vacation at a mountain resort
in North India,
your 18 year old daughter
might reveal that she eats beef.
Tell her to leave your house.
She might say ‘ok’.
Leap at her.
Your wife might pull you back
and escort you out of the restaurant.
Does this mean that you will go back
to being untouchable?
What right does your daughter have
to take you back to a place
that you fought to escape from?
Later that day,
put your hands
on your daughter’s shoulder.
Walk with her.
Stand by a bridge
overlooking a valley.
Tell her she can eat
whatever she wants to.
Tell her you will not force her.
‘Just eat it outside, not at home, ok?’
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